Poema Medicamentorum

Poema Medicamentorum*

Zestril leads the morning prayer,
To keep the pressure from the snare.
But watch the throat for swelling’s sign,
Or that dry cough in a steady line.
If Angioedema blocks the breath,
It’s a race against a sudden death;
Avoid the salt-substitute's glow,
Lest the potassium levels overflow.

Glucophage is the steady base,
To keep the sugar in its place.
But the gut may churn in a stormy sea,
With "bathroom runs" and misery.
Beware the Lactic Acidosis chill,
A rare but heavy metabolic bill;
If your kidneys fail or you drink too much,
The pH slips from the body's clutch.

Zoloft for the darkened day,
To drive the heavy clouds away.
But the mind may wander to a ledge,
With a sharp and suicidal edge.
If the sweat breaks out and the muscles twitch,
You’ve flipped the Serotonin switch;
Do not mix with the older crew,
The MAOIs will turn the pressure blue.

Coumadin is the narrow street,
Where the blood and the vitamin K must meet.
Keep the salads at a level pace,
Lest the clotting factors lose the race.
A purple bruise or a crimson gum,
Warns that the bleeding risk has come;
Contraindicated for the womb,
A teratogenic, silent doom.

Lipitor guards the vessel’s wall,
To keep the cholesterol from the fall.
But if your muscles ache and burn,
And the urine takes a "cola" turn,
Rhabdomyolysis has begun,
Under the pharmacological sun.
Check the liver, watch the juice,
Before the enzymes are let loose.

Xanax for the frantic heart,
To keep the panic far apart.
But it binds the mind in a sleepy chain,
A habit-forming, grey domain.
Contraindicated with the wine,
Or the OxyContin line;
The breath may slow, the pulse may cease,
In a heavy, permanent, drowsy peace.

Jardiance lets the sugar fly,
Through the kidney’s filters, running dry.
But the "Sweetness" draws a fungal foe,
Where Yeast Infections start to grow.
And watch for the flesh, the skin’s decay,
Fournier’s Gangrene—stay away.
If you’re dizzy, weak, or feeling low,
The Ketoacidosis might be in tow.

Humira for the joint’s fierce fire,
To lower the immune system’s wire.
But it opens the gate for the hidden guest,
Putting the Tuberculosis to the test.
The "Black Box" warns of the cancer’s seed,
Where the lymphomas and the tumors breed.
Avoid the "Live" vaccines’ embrace,
Lest the virus win the cellular race.

Eliquis for the rhythmic skip,
To keep the stroke from a sudden trip.
No needles needed, no constant test,
But the internal bleed is a heavy guest.
Spinal Hematoma is the risk you run,
If the epidural needle is begun;
Do not stop it on a whim or a dare,
Or the clot will find you unaware.

Zithromax (the "Z-Pak") starts the fight,
To set the lung and the sinus right.
But watch the rhythm of the heart’s own beat,
Where QT Prolongation finds a seat.
If the liver yellows or the stomach cries,
Or a blistering rash begins to rise,
Stevens-Johnson may be in the skin—
Stop the dose before the scales begin.

Levaquin strikes with a heavy hand,
To clear the bacteria from the land.
But heed the "Black Box" on the label's edge:
The Tendon teeters on a jagged ledge.
The Achilles snaps without a sign,
A rupture in the fibrous line.
Avoid the sun, the ultraviolet ray,
Lest Phototoxicity ruins the day.

Advair comes in a purple wheel,
To help the tightened airways heal.
Wash the mouth with a water's trace,
To keep the Thrush from the throat’s deep space.
It builds the strength of the breath over time,
But the steroid cost is a steady climb;
Watch the pressure in the eye’s clear dome,
Lest Glaucoma makes your sight its home.

Spiriva (the "HandiHaler") brings relief,
To make the heavy wheezing brief.
But the mouth grows dry as a desert floor,
And the "Golden Stream" may flow no more.
Urinary Retention—the bladder’s lock—
Can give the aging frame a shock;
Keep the powder from the eye’s bright blue,
Lest the vision blurs and the pupils skew.

Nexium (the "Purple Pill") is king,
To stop the acid’s burning sting.
But the bones may weaken, the hip may break,
From the mineral toll that the pump-blocks take.
It invites the C. diff to the colon’s hall,
Where the watery toxins start to sprawl;
And the magnesium levels might drop low,
Making the muscles and the rhythm slow.

Vicodin for the post-op pain,
To quiet the signal in the brain.
But the Tylenol (Acetaminophen) inside,
Is where the liver’s dangers hide.
Too much "APAP" and the cells will die,
While the breath grows shallow, running dry.
Dependency waits in the amber glass,
A heavy shadow that may not pass.

Lyrica for the nerve’s sharp sting,
Or the quiet buzz that the shingles bring.
But the world may spin and the feet may swell,
While the "brain fog" settles in its shell.
Watch the mood for a sudden shift,
Where the thoughts of self-harm start to drift;
And if the breathing slows in a heavy sleep,
The respiratory debt is yours to keep.

Topamax (the "Stope-a-max" of old),
To keep the migraines and the seizures controlled.
But the words may stumble and the tastes may change,
As the soda’s fizz feels bitter and strange.
Metabolic Acidosis—the blood’s sharp turn—
Where the kidneys struggle and the senses burn;
Keep the water flowing, stay out of the heat,
Lest the Oligohidrosis find you beat.

Lantus is the long, slow tide,
To keep the sugar’s peaks inside.
One shot a day to set the floor,
But Hypoglycemia knocks at the door.
If the sweat breaks cold and the vision blurs,
The "Low" is the danger that occurs;
Rotate the site where the needle goes,
Lest the Lipodystrophy lumpy rows.

Humalog is the rapid strike,
To blunt the meal-time glucose spike.
It works in minutes, sharp and fast,
But the "crash" is a shadow that is cast.
If you skip the carb or the dose is high,
The brain’s own fuel may quickly dry;
Keep the glucose tabs or the juice in reach,
For the lesson that the "low" will teach.

Abilify to bridge the gap,
When the mood falls into a heavy trap.
But the restless legs may need to pace—
Akathisia's frantic, inner race.
Watch for the "twitch" in the mouth or eye,
Tardive Dyskinesia’s permanent sigh;
And the sugar and weight may start to climb,
A metabolic tax upon your time.

Synthroid for the thyroid’s slow,
To make the metabolic fire glow.
Take it alone when the sun first breaks,
Before the coffee or the morning cakes.
But if the heart starts to race and pound,
Or a tremors in the hands are found,
The dose is high, the "Storm" is near,
A hyper-state is the sign to fear.

Dupixent for the weeping skin,
Where the flares of eczema begin.
It stills the itch and the redness clear,
By quieting the "Type 2" inner gear.
But the eyes may burn and the lids may swell,
Where Keratitis symptoms dwell;
Watch for the cold sore’s stinging return,
While the immune pathways start to learn.

Enbrel for the joints that lock,
To stop the inflammation’s steady shock.
But the shield is lowered, the walls are down,
Letting the infections take the crown.
Black Box warnings: lymphoma’s risk,
Where the cellular change is sharp and brisk;
If a fever rises or the glands grow large,
The body’s defenses have left their charge.

Cialis for the weekend’s light,
To keep the vessels open, firm and bright.
But never touch the Nitro's glow,
Lest the pressure fall too far and low.
If the vision fades or the world turns blue,
The optic nerve is calling out to you;
And if the "clock" strikes four hours long,
Seek the doctor for what has gone wrong.

Myrbetriq for the bladder’s urge,
To stop the sudden, frantic surge.
It relaxes the wall to hold the store,
But the blood pressure might start to soar.
Watch for the headache and the racing beat,
As the "Beta-3" finds its clinical seat;
Contraindicated if the tension's high,
Lest the numbers climb toward the sky.

Accutane (the name that many fear),
To make the stubborn cystic acne clear.
But the IPLEDGE contract is signed in ink,
Lest a life be lost before it can blink.
Severe Birth Defects are the shadow’s name,
With liver damage and a "mood-swing" game;
The lips will crack and the eyes grow dry,
As the oils of the body start to die.

Botox for the furrowed brow,
Or to stop the migraine’s heavy plow.
But the toxin’s "drift" is the rarest dread,
Where the muscle weakness starts to spread.
If the eyelid droops or the swallow fails,
The botulinum's power prevails;
Keep it localized, keep it tight,
To stay within the surgeon's sight.

Tamiflu for the winter’s ache,
To stop the virus for the body's sake.
But take it early, in the first two days,
Before the viral fire is ablaze.
Watch for the "mind-change," strange and deep,
Where delirium haunts the patient’s sleep;
Especially in the young, a clouded state,
Can be the neuro-psychiatric fate.

Shingrix for the dormant fire,
To keep the Shingles from the nerve’s wire.
The arm will throb, the fever might rise,
As the immune system wakes and tries.
A heavy fatigue for a day or two,
Is the tax the vaccine asks of you;
But the "GBS" (Guillain-Barré) is the rarest dread,
Where weakness starts in the feet and spread.

Keytruda for the cellular war,
To open the "Checkpoint" and settle the score.
It unmasks the cancer, it lets the T-cells see,
To fight the tumor and set the body free.
But the "Immune-Mediated" storms can blow,
Where the lungs, the gut, and the liver go
Into a flare of inflammation’s heat—
A battle where the body feels defeat.

Herceptin for the HER2 sign,
To stop the breast-cell's rapid line.
But the heart may falter under the weight,
Cardiotoxicity—a heavy fate.
Monitor the "Ejection Fraction" flow,
To see how well the ventricles go;
If the breath grows short or the ankles swell,
The pump is failing and all is not well.

Paxlovid for the viral tide,
Where the Ritonavir sits inside.
It stops the protease, it breaks the chain,
But the "Paxlovid Mouth" is a metallic stain.
Beware the interactions, the list is long,
Where the liver enzymes sing a dangerous song;
It boosts the levels of the other pills,
Creating a cycle of clinical thrills.

Gardasil for the future’s shield,
To make the HPV virus yield.
A faintness might follow the needle’s sting,
A Syncope that the nerves can bring.
Stay seated for a while, a fifteen-minute rest,
To put the dizzy feeling to the test;
It guards the cervix and the throat as well,
Against the cancers where the viruses dwell.

*This poem is for artistic and aesthetic purposes. Always consult a licensed professional and read the specific Medication Guide provided by your pharmacist before starting any treatment.